You’ll Kill a Spider If You Read This

What kind of things are you afraid of? I’ve got this thing about webs.

No, not spiders. Those I can handle well enough. I mean webs. Let me explain.

If I should be walking along and happen to see a spider crawling by, I’d very calmly walk over and squish it. However, if I should be walking along that same path and walk through a mass of webs, I’m flailing around like the malfunctioning massage bot on Wall-E. Really a single strand would have the same effect.

It’s like walking into a net that you can’t see. Sure I can break through, but the damn things just go right on sticking to me. In some ways a single strand is worse. I can feel it tangled in the hair on my legs, but I can’t see it.

What are the chances? As I was writing this, a spider just crawled onto my keyboard. A quick and little brown guy. He got spaced. By that I mean, he paused a bit too long on the space bar, and I took care of him. PETA nothing, that little spider crossed his boundary and had to pay the price. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t go out of my way to kill spiders, but if they come within squashing distance, it’s on.

Now if that little guy had shown up a few hours earlier and worked its web magic over the keys, then I’d have been screwed. No writing would have gotten done. Even if I managed to clean it up, I would’ve been haunted by ghost webs for the rest of the evening. Productivity is thrown out the window when you’re constantly brushing away imaginary webs off your arms.

So what kind of irrational fears do you have? I can’t be the only one.

Phase One Update…

Currently one-third through Raven’s Mark. I’m scraping whatever time I can get to read through it, and I’m not the fastest reader. The next phase should start by Monday at the latest.

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2 thoughts on “You’ll Kill a Spider If You Read This

    1. Try to think of it as “becoming one with the writing implement.”
      Spiders bite.
      They are bad.
      As a child I’ve woken up one too many mornings with spider bites on my legs. Let me tell you, it’s no fun going to school when it looks like you have an extra knee cap or two.

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